''I'm always going to guard and protect Ali's heart. I'm wearing my heart on my sleeve.''

Moving forward with my social anthropology research that I began last week with the cruise, I've decided to take a in depth look at the oh-so-addictive "dating" show, The Bachelorette (or the Bachelor in some cases). Now, I've only watched a few seasons, so my knowledge of the show is a bit limited, but I will go off of what I do know.

From watching this season, in particular, I've learned many what-to-do's and what-not-to-do's on a reality dating show, which I will now discuss.

This season we have as our Bachelorette career gal Ali from the previous season of the Bachelor starring pilot Jake (who, by the way, just split from winner/his fiancee Vienna). As per usual, the next season of the Bachelor/Bachelorette typically stars a fan fave from the previous season, who was booted with a broken heart and now back and ready to "find love". I only watched 1 or 2 episodes of Jake's season, so I didn't really get to know Ali back then, but supposedly she was a front runner for Jake's heart, until she decided her job was more important than an engagement, that would inevitably end, as all, with the exception of Trista and Ryan, do.

Let's get back to the topic at hand, what-to-do and what-not-to-do. As in every other competition reality show, the contestants always need to go in with a strategy in order to stick around. Here's what I've learned from this season of the Bachelorette:

DO: Come out of the gate with a sweet, although not too cheesy, opening line to make sure she/he remembers you, and ideally your name, when it's time for the cocktail party.

DON'T: Reveal TMI, embarrassing stories about yourself at the first meeting, that will cause uncomfortable, WTF moments from both the bachelor/bachelorette and the viewers.

DO: Share personal stories, which will make the bachelor/bachelorette feel like they've connected more with you than other contestants, but don't use them to your advantage (see Chris L. who decided to wait to tell Ali about his mother who had recently passed away).

DON'T: Use affectionate nicknames (ie Baby, Babe, etc) for someone you've never actually spent any alone time with. It won't make the other person feel like he/she is more into you and just causes awkward moments.

DO: Make yourself become the "villian" of the house. Apparently it makes you stand out and brings out sympathy of the bachelor/bachelorette who sees beyond what the other people in the house sees, or their "genuineness".

DON'T: Come on the show if you have a girlfriend/boyfriend at home. The bachelor/bachelorette will ALWAYS find out. Although, it does allow for some great dramatic television! So, maybe that could be a DO if you want to parlay your time on the show into an acting career.

DO: Find a way to get a little smooch action on one-on-one dates. A good make-out sesh can easily be confused for real chemistry and connection.

DON'T: Act like a crazy person, by singing (not well), declaring your love on the first date, repeating a catch phrase (I'm talkin' to you, Kasey!) over and over again, tattooing your body with said catch phrase, or basically being too desperate.

DO: Expect to do plenty of promotional "we love each other and are planning our wedding" stops "after the final rose" but....

DON'T: Expect to actually end up marrying the bachelor/bachelorette.

So I know I sound like a cynic about "love" with my theories on the Bachelor/Bachelorette, but you have to take history into account. The only couple from the show that ended up getting married are Trista and Ryan, from the first season of the Bachelorette and while Jason from the Bachelor a few years ago did end up marrying someone from the show, it WASN'T the girl he proposed to in the final episode. I will continue in my quest to be an social anthropologist while watching the remainder of the current season and maybe I'll be able to add to my list of do's and dont's.

Until next time... xo

Title quote: Kasey, "The Bachelorette"